Sage Thoughts

Pondering with purpose…


Crisis Vs. Perspective

Faith and Courage lead the way.

There comes a point in life where relationships as we have known them start to seem foggy and not as bright. A place where the intimacy and connection fade and we are standing there with the one we have loved so well wondering where the meaning of us went.

There comes a time when we have to look inside and no matter how painful the choice is, we have to choose what is best for us and for the path we are walking on. Purging out all the memories of how relationships are meant to go as taught to us by our parents, our peers, society and life. We realize that things do not always work out as hoped.

Midlife is prime time for these kinds of changes in perspective. After all the trappings of the things we thought we were supposed to do with our lives are achieved and or fall by the wayside, we start to move inward in pursuit of our purest passions. Some people can do this by learning something new, taking up a new hobby. Some people need more drastic change like moving to a new place or changing jobs, still others realize the life they have built over the past 20 years leaves them drained and feeling numb, so they leave relationships that were understood to be for life.

As we travel inward everything in our world starts to feel more acute. We listen for the whispers that we heard so readily as children and young adults. The guiding voice of our heart telling us what feels right or not quite. Honesty with self is crucial at this time of life, for what good are hearing your whispers if you deny the message? Courage and faith are paramount to see us through to the next steps, the next phase on the path. Often there is collateral damage; strewn about are empty bank accounts, lost status, dead or dying relationships. It is our right, our choice and our obligation to leave them all behind,  right there on the path, the moment the burden becomes too heavy and the reward too slim. Dragging around dead weight only slows us down, makes us unable to make choices and unable to be our authentic selves. It slows us down like a quagmire, as we trudge along carrying all the extra baggage of past resentments and decisions gone badly.

The only way to move forward then is to lighten the load. If it doesn’t help you, serve you, raise you up, it has to go. Put it on the back burner if you think someday there may be use for it, but forget it for now. Or just plain walk away forever if you see no use for it.

It is like springtime closet cleaning, assessment time. If it works, if it feeds you, keep it and shelter it. If not, release it to the wind. The path unfolds before you and now with eyes and heart wide open you are able to move forward one step, one day, one opportunity at a time. Love will come, money will come, strength will come just at the moments you need it most.  Faith, Courage, Strength, Wisdom are the jewels we pick up as we walk the paths to our true selves. As we share who we truly are with the world and help make the world a better place one interaction at a time.

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